Uniquely funny things. Wholly Indian. Right from struggling with the toilet paper to searching for the Father of our Nation in a foreign land.
A rule without exception. A bag, usually bigger than the one holding clothes, will be full of ready made, and ready to make Indian food.
Tweet 1 "Driving to the airport... Yayyy"
Tweet 2 "T2 is glitzy" with a selfie smoozing the world.
FB Update: "Eager Beaver is travelling to 'some goddam place' with Mrs. Beaver from Chatrapati Shivaji International Airport, Mumbai, India"
Get it yet? While you are stapled to your work desk, this dude is TRAVELLING!
So much to see, and so little time. We'll sit watery eyed, and try to tear through the entire list of movies, serials, music, games, cartoons, whatever. Every now and then we check the flight location on the map, and that makes us all the more anxious. Travellers of other nationalities can't wait to get off the plane, and we feel pangs of sadness at leaving the beloved In-Flight Entertainment.
Papa, mama and grown ass son on a tiny double bed. What, why pay for an extra bed?! We’re family, and if push comes to shove, then Papa can always sleep on the floor. Mama won’t allow that for her darling grown ass son.
Yes, that and foreign currency, always in the specially tailored inside pocket of the cotton vest. Over which is a full sleeve shirt. Over which is a leather jacket. Even in 40 degree Celsius heat.
Better safe over sorry, sweat over regret.
Paris can be thoroughly seen and enjoyed in a day max. What’s there to see in Louvre from inside?
We usually don’t go to small cities. Unless they come in way of our grand plan. Then we see them!
When in doubt, ask. Indian male does not believe in losing his way for the sake of his ego. That’s a white man's trait. We’re abroad. We’re new. We’re guests (entitled to act as pests). And we’re invariably always lost, or on the verge of it. Better ask, confirm, walk a few steps, spot another amiable gentleman. “Excuse me…” Reconfirm!
Fret not, these nice hotel people have kept those glass muggas on the basin counter again! Not as handy as the 'jet', but what the heck.
If there is half price for under 15 year olds at an amusement park, then a malnourished 18 year old will always be told as 14. That’s how we drive bargains.
Meaning Gandhi restaurant.
Local sights are fine, local smells too. Local taste. Now that could include balls of a bull no? Better stick to Paneer Tikka Masala at Gandhi, Nehru, Buddha, Ganesha, Indra, Shiva, Brahma or any other restaurant named after millions of Indian Gods.
In the Tower of London is our precious Kohinoor diamond. I say our, because I once heard an Indian gentleman say it to the guards there.
The family of five would just not leave the walkalator (travelator, moving walk way, whatever), in front of the diamond. They started walking back on it, saying "It's ours, we'll see for as long as we want." No jokes, I could see tears in their eyes, and hear the silent JaNaGaNaMaNa coming from their hearts.
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