Mishraji's Illness

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Once, a tall, lanky man visited my clinic with his large, round wife.

“Mishraji” I read out his name from his OPD paper. “How are you feeling today?”

Mishraji cast a nervous look at his wife and said, “not so good, doctor. Not so good at all.”

“What’s the problem?” I asked, but my doctor’s antenna was already going off. I gave him a quick appraisal. He was a middle aged man with more bones than flesh inside his skin and a frightful, agitated look about him.

“Look at him, doctor sahab, began the wife, “He doesn’t eat properly. He has lost so much weight. He hardly sleeps at night. Keeps tossing and turning all night and keeps me awake too.”

“Since how long?” I asked, looking directly at the patient. But before he opened his mouth, she beat him to it. “It’s been three months. He cant concentrate on anything. Sweats like a pig, he does. I don’t know what comes over him.”

I felt Mishraji’s palm. It sure was clammy. He was tachycardic too.

“Why aren’t you eating, Mishraji?” I asked.

“No.. er..I eat a lot, actually.”

No he doesnt. Why are you lying to the doctor?
Madam, would you let him talk?

At this, she kept quiet but continued to look dissatisfied. But alas, my standing up for Mishrajis right to speech turned out to be worthless as he simply sat there with his eyes lowered, fidgeting with his shirt.

“Hmm.” I thought to myself. Increased appetite, weight loss, diaphoresis, insomnia...was it me or did he have bulging eyes too? This seemed pretty straightforward to me. The man was probably hyperthyroid.

“Do your hands shake?” I asked, stretching out his hands in front of him to look for fine tremors.

Mishraji nodded guiltily. No demonstrable tremors and no obvious neck swelling, I noted.

“Do you occasionally feel your heart beating hard and fast inside your chest?” I asked.

“Yes. Occasionally.” Mishraji said, his hand reflexively touching his chest. He looked flabbergasted at me as if wondering how I knew that about him. I knew asking leading questions was wrong but I loved having that effect on people.
So it seemed Mishraji had paroxysmal atrial fibrillation, a common complication of hyperthyroidism.

“And do you feel hot even in cold weather?” I continued my triumphant spree.

“Sometimes, yes.” said Mishraji, loosening his collar. Even the wife was visibly impressed with me. I smiled my knowing doctor’s smile.

I concluded the rest of his examination, finished my notes and advised the requisite tests for hyperthyroidism. “Come back with the report. We’ll take it from there.” I said and they got up to leave.

But as soon as the wife exited the door, Mishraji came back and said in hushed tones. “Thank you doctor sahab, for not telling the missus.”

I looked at him confused.

“I don’t know how you do it. I’ve been hiding it from my wife for three months and you caught me within minutes!”

“Hiding what, Mishraji?” I asked, now positively alarmed.

“Why, that I’m in love, of course! She moved into the neighbour’s house three months ago. It was love at first sight. Ever since then, I can’t eat, sleep or do anything right. If only I had the courage to tell her...but something comes over me whenever I see her. I start sweating profusely, my hands start trembling, my heart feels like it’ll jump out. What do I do, doctor sahab? Do you have a pill thatll make me tell her everything?”

I stared at him dumbfounded. Love, not hyperthyroidism. Love! I simply took the OPD paper from Mishrajis hand, laughing inwardly at myself, pushed it into the dustbin and showed him the door saying, “Mishraji, I believe your wife is waiting for you.


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14 comments

Rishabh Ch..

04 Feb 2014
.., wrote:
ROFL, this is a big anti-climax. Not the twist which takes your breath away, but makes you go wtf ! (Sonesh would like this). Very different from your other pieces of writing. Not very descriptive. Did you consciously attempt it to be written this way? While I was reading, I wondered why were you dropping names of all these illnesses, without saying what they are. Not of much importance, I realised later.

Aditi Chin..

04 Feb 2014
.., wrote:
Okay, there's a mistake. I realized it just now as I re-read the story. Hyperthyroidism causes increased appetite. Oh well, you get the picture though. :P

Aditi Chin..

04 Feb 2014
.., wrote:
Rishabh, yeah I just wanted to write something light for a change.

Vivek Bane..

04 Feb 2014
.., wrote:
:-)) Nice

Shawn Pere..

04 Feb 2014
.., wrote:
Ha ha ha...A good way to reduce is to fall in love ;-)

..

04 Feb 2014
.., wrote: haha..

Ravishanka..

04 Feb 2014
.., wrote:
There was a certain lack of build up that would have served more strongly for the anti-climatic ending. The story moved in too pat and predictive fashion.A bit more of Mrs. Mishra and her wifely qualities or lack of it would have added some more spice to this tale.

Shobha Kap..

04 Feb 2014
.., wrote:
Nice story! I could not have predicted the end at all. There was a story I remember reading in school about this man who goes to an optician and cannot read no matter which specs he tries; because he just doesn't know how to read! This story reminded me of that one.

swapnil ma..

18 Jun 2014
swapnil ma.., wrote: nice story ... loved the way u narrated it ...

Judith..

28 Aug 2014
Judith.., wrote: I read a lot of interesting posts here. Probably you spend a lot of time writing, i know how to save you a lot of work, there is an online tool that creates high quality, google friendly articles in seconds, just search in google - laranitas free content source

Judith..

28 Aug 2014
Judith.., wrote: I read a lot of interesting posts here. Probably you spend a lot of time writing, i know how to save you a lot of work, there is an online tool that creates high quality, google friendly articles in seconds, just search in google - laranitas free content source

EsterSHoit..

17 Jun 2015
EsterSHoit.., wrote: Link exchange is nothing else but it is only placing the other person's web site link on your page at suitable place and other person will also do same for you.

RenaldoZRa..

19 Jun 2015
RenaldoZRa.., wrote: Wow, awesome blog layout! How long have you been blogging for? you make blogging look easy. The overall look of your web site is great, let alone the content!

ReganAPenn..

20 Jun 2015
ReganAPenn.., wrote: I think that everything typed made a bunch of sense. But, what about this? what if you added a little information? I mean, I don't wish to tell you how to run your blog, however what if you added something that makes people want more? I mean Mishraji's Illness is a little vanilla. You might look at Yahoo's front page and watch how they create article headlines to get people to click. You might try adding a video or a related picture or two to grab people interested about what you've written. Just my opinion, it could bring your blog a little livelier.

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