Top 10 Ways in Which You Should Definitely Not Propose to a Girl

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Knock, knock! Who's there? Marry. Marry, who? Marry me #wtf. Are you joking or proposing? Let's look at top 10 ways in which you should DEFINITELY NOT propose to a girl.

1. Sing below her balcony holding an 'I Love You' placard

You aren’t Enrique or Romeo; you are going to be pissing all her neighbours off. And her. Also, be alert, her dad might just shoot you from the window. 

2. In front of her family

Especially, if the family cares about 'log kya sochenge' and thinks love-marriage and inter caste marriage is just a pile of steaming manure. Also, it could be downright embarrassing for the girl. She can't even kiss you after saying yes, with all her relatives' speculative eyes on her. 

3. While looking at her sister, friend, or worse, mother

…yeah and that’s incestuous behaviour too. 

4. By faking her kidnapping

Ask any girl what's one thing she dreads the most. Resounding answer will be getting kidnapped, and everything that comes after that. Believe me, genius, you're just going to piss her off...and you're going to lose her.

5. Placing a ring in her champagne or food

Mixing non-edible items in edible food is a complete no-no. Unless you're planning to choke her to death with good intention.

6. When you are absolutely drunk out of your mind

Because after drinking, you love the whole world. Haven't you seen guys screaming "bhai hai tu mera" and girls croaking "I love you" to their friends. How will she know you've not friendzoned her? Besides, imagine if she takes you up for it, leans in to kiss you, and you puke in her mouth. No, please. For girls, proposl is a BIG thing. Don't do it with a stinking mouth.

7. On Facebook

Or any other social media. If you haven't noticed, facebook is only used as an advertising platform. Besides with so many people peeing on her wall, you don't want your proposal to be there.  

8. At a sporting event or a music concert

People have come to see the game or enjoy their favourite artist at the concert. They don’t care about your love life, worse you might get booed at! Not a good idea.

9. By making a tattoo

You might regret this for life if she says no. Also it’s not romantic!

10. When she isn't looking her best, or she is at her worst

She is all sweaty, and her hair is all over the place, are you going to give her then, a special moment that she has to remember all her life? #stopbeinganarse #growup

You think we missed something? Have you had or heard of a proposal which was so outlandish that it deserves to me mentioned here? Write in the comments below and I might include it in the list.

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6 comments

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26 Jun 2015
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